Considering that there will be a new Emmy Award this year for best reality-show judge, it's important that we pay special attention to what those naysayers, sourpusses and rascals are up to now.
On TV's top reality show last night, "American Idol," there was another hilariously revealing clash between Simon Cowell and Paula Abdul. I think it's obvious to everyone, including Paula, that she's on her way out. Her contract's over at the end of this season and Simon — who's now running the show — sometimes forgets to hide his disgust for her in the meantime.
Last week, Simon and Paula began the "American Idol" telecast by linking hands as they strolled toward their jurist bench. Last night, Simon would win no award for acting. He let loose on Paula in one of those hissy fits that make him the TV wildcat we most love to hate.
Soon after Danny Gokey finished his bizarre rendition of "Stand by Me" and Randy Jackson and Kara DioGuardi predictably gushed over the show's golden boy while confessing that they didn't like his song's arrangement, it was Paula's turn to comment. That's always a special moment at the start of each "American Idol," when we viewers lean in close to the TV screen to see: Is Paula tuned in? Zonked out? Taking her own rocket ride to Neptune again? The answer was hard to fathom during the opening musical number last night when Paula teased us by jumping up from her seat and wiggling about — she's been doing that a lot lately, as if to convince us how cool a 46-year-old gal can be. But Simon soon knocked her down.
Addressing Danny, Paula offered her approval of his performance: "Everything from the creative liberties you took with the arrangement, which I happened to like very much, to the chord substitutions — they equally match how brilliant your voice was tonight."
Simon laughed uncontrollably while she opined, holding his hand over his face, trying to gag his guffaws, but he couldn't. When she was done, he snarled to her privately, "Why do you say things like that?"
"Well, that's what it is!"
"I don't understand you!" he growled, dismissing her nastily.
Hey, Simon, quit picking on Paula when she doesn't deserve it! She was actually in the same galaxy as everyone else last night, kind of making sense too.