As I note in my overview article about the Emmy program races (CLICK HERE), TV's top program, "American Idol," has never won best reality-competition show and, even more amazing, "Amazing Race" has never lost.
At the Creative Arts Emmy ceremony last Sunday I caught up with Kynt and Vyxsin — "a couple of Goth kids from Louisville," says Kynt — whose elimination episode of "Amazing Race" will decide that show's fate this year. That's the one that was judged by Emmy voters — and it's a doozie full of thrilling action as five teams compete in Mumbai, India, to thread 108 flowers into a wedding garland, deliver propane gas tanks to residents and ride a rickshaw to a tailor shop.
However, "American Idol" submitted an excellent episode too: the two-hour season finale that not only includes the gripping suspense over which of the two Davids (Cook or Archuletta) will win, but their joint performance of Nickelback's "Hero" and other socko musical turns by Donna Summer, ZZ Top, the Jonas Brothers and past "Idol" champ Carrie Underwood.
The episode selection is so good that "Idol" actually has a shot at winning this year — except for one, big, annoying thing. Nine minutes into the episode there's a stupid plug for Mike Myers' movie bomb "The Love Guru" that refuses to end. Will Emmy voters be so turned off that they'll, literally, turn the DVD screener of the episode off too early?
It's painful to watch. "Idol" producers force the two Davids to sit through a screening of "The Love Guru" and pretend to laugh, then they're subjected to a personal encounter with Guru Pitka himself, who barks unfunny advice at them. Even though the guru dons a beard, he yells at Cook for having facial hair: "It's not the '90s! The last time I saw stubble like that I was at a 'Melrose Place' party." And the prediction he snickers at Archuletta is totally creepy: "Soon you'll have hair in weird and wonderful places!" As if all of that isn't insufferable enough, the "Love Guru" plug continues further into the episode with — no, please, noooooo! — an actual visit by Myers to the set of "Idol," forcing poor Ryan Seacrest to make fumbling small talk and pretend to laugh at Myers' awful "jokes."
Please forgive these crazy Goth kids in this video. Kynt makes an Emmy goof right up front. "Amazing Race" has won the Emmy as best reality-competition show five times straight, not six. At least so far. Maybe, just maybe, this will come true on Sunday night -- thanks to the Love Guru.
Photos: ABC, Fox. Video: Los Angeles Times