Come to think of it, maybe Matt Damon was right when he recently said that the Oscars "get it wrong more often than they get it right."

If I were the king of the Oscars (someday — just you wait, Derbyites!) and had the power to take away past wins, the first awards I'd yank from the clutches of undeserved winners are these: Reese Witherspoon ("Walk the Line"), Nicole Kidman ("The Hours"), Sean Penn ("Mystic River" — I'd let him keep the Oscar if he'd won for "21 Grams" that year), Russell Crowe ("Gladiator"), Geoffrey Rush ("Shine"), Jack Nicholson and Helen Hunt ("As Good as It Gets"), Al Pacino ("Scent of a Woman" — he could keep the Oscar if he'd won it for any other nomination any other year), Sally Field ("Places in the Heart"), Glenda Jackson ("A Touch of Class"), Cliff Robertson ("Charly") and Elizabeth Taylor ("Butterfield 8").

Those are examples just among the living. If I had the monarchical powers to reach beyond the grave, all of the following would be in big trouble: Paul Newman ("The Color of Money"), Jack Lemmon ("Save the Tiger"), John Wayne ("True Grit"), Katharine Hepburn ("Guess Who's Coming to Dinner"), Ingrid Bergman ("Anastasia"), Lee Marvin ("Cat Ballou") and Charlton Heston ("Ben-Hur")

Oh, yeah, and I'd not only force another member of the royal class, Princess Grace of Monaco, to abdicate as Oscar queen for "Country Girl," but I'd make her give the 1954 best-actress crown to Judy Garland ("A Star Is Born") — along with an apology. Ditto Judy Holliday ("Born Yesterday") to poor Gloria Swanson ("Sunset Blvd.").

"Best pictures" that must be rescinded: "The Departed," "Braveheart," "Unforgiven," "Dances With Wolves," "Out of Africa," "Gandhi," "Rocky," "Ben-Hur," "Around the World in 80 Days," "The Greatest Show on Earth," and "An American in Paris."

All of the above are examples only since 1950. I'm too lazy right now — and too whipped up with outrage since starting to write this post— to go back further or to address the supporting races (Goldie Hawn in "Cactus Flower"!).

But the posters in The Envelope's Gold Derby forums don't shrink from any Oscar year and have been playing this same fantasy game themselves since just before the recent Academy Awards in February. Check out their fumings here. Click through the page numbers at the bottom and top of the forum thread to keep reading. And then add your own picks for an Oscar pull-back.

Caresa: "I would take away 'Crash''s BP Oscar and give it to 'Brokeback Mountain' in 2005."

Pacinofan: "'Since I think no one ever squandered their Oscar win more than Cuba Gooding Jr., I would take his Oscar and give it to ... anyone I happened to come across on the streets."

AJ: "Jack Lemmon should give his 'Save the Tiger' Oscar to Al Pacino for 'Serpico,' but Jack Lemmon deserved the lead Oscar for 'Some Like it Hot' over Charlton Heston in 'Ben-Hur.' "

• Now that she's back in the U.K., Kate Winslet ("The Reader") comes clean about where she plans to keep her Academy Award statuette — right next to the one won by her husband Sam Mendes for directing best picture "American Beauty": "The Oscar's going in the loo, next to Sam's." London Daily Mail

• Oscar's best actor Sean Penn wants President Barack Obama to see "Milk" soon: "Eventually we are hoping for a White House screening. I think this film will be one of the steps forward. It will be part of the dialog." Agence France-Presse

• Two early U.K. investors in "Slumdog Millionaire" — Film4 and Celador — won't get a huge chunk of profits after its Oscar success, according a Brit newspaper. It claims biggest payoffs will go to theaters, distributors, Fox Searchlight and Pathe. London Independent

• A London tabloid reports that the joyous spirit of "Slumdog Millionaire's" Oscars victory didn't last long when one of the young stars returned India. The Sun

• Chris Brown and Rihanna are reportedly back together after that nasty clash following a pre-Grammy party. Dish Rag

• A two-time past winner of the Venice Film Festival's Golden Lion will head the fest's next jury: Ang Lee. Associated Press

• Jennifer Hudson told Oprah Winfrey on Friday that she's named two of her dogs Oscar and Grammy! She also revealed how wowed she was to receive the Grammy for best R&B album recently from presenter Whitney Houston. "As soon as she stepped out on the stage, I lost it," Jennifer Hudson said. "That's when I got emotional." Chicago Tribune

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The day after the Oscars, Keith Olbermann exulted in the bold expressions of free speech on the kudocast. He said on MSNBC, "If last night had been the 2003 Oscars, Dustin Lance Black, Bill Maher and Sean Penn probably would have spent the day raked over the coals by the yapping toadies of the media-government complex. Screw the toadies. They lost and free speech won!"

But not so on TV seen on the other side of the world.

Much of India was tuned in to the Oscars to see the victories by "Slumdog Millionaire," but they didn't get the whole telecast.

Asian satellite TV network STAR, owned by Rupert Murdoch, admits that it censored the acceptance speeches of "Milk" writer Dustin Lance Black and star Sean Penn in re-broadcasts, eliminating sound when the words "gay" or "lesbian" were spoken, because it had "a responsibility to take the sensitivities and guidelines of all our markets into consideration," spokeswoman Jannie Poon told the Associated Press. STAR reaches more than 300 million viewers in 53 nations.

However, a tipster tells Defamer.com that the words were also edited out of live broadcasts in India, but he doesn't identify the offending TV network.

Pang Khee Teik, a prominent Malaysian arts commentator, wrote a letter of protest to several media organizations, according to the AP. He said the gagging "sent a message ... that gays and lesbians are still shameful things to be censored from the public's ears."

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'Slumdog Millionaire' looked like a strong Oscars filly right out of the gate

In Memoriam: Oscars' winners and nominees

Sean Penn is the ninth actor to win two lead Oscars

With his win for "Milk," Sean Penn became the ninth man to have matching lead actor Oscar bookends, having earned his first in 2003 for "Mystic River." While Penn only had to wait five years to win that second Oscar, last year's champ Daniel Day-Lewis ("There Will Be Blood") didn't gain entry to this exclusive club until 18 years after winning his first Oscar in 1989 for "My Left Foot."

The first seven actors to pull off this impressive feat were:

Spencer Tracy ("Captains Courageous" 1937; "Boys Town" 1938);

Fredric March ("Doctor Jekyll and Mr. Hyde" 1932; "The Best Years of Our Lives" 1946);

Gary Cooper ("Sergeant York" 1941; "High Noon" 1952);

Marlon Brando ("On the Waterfront" 1954; "The Godfather" 1972);

Dustin Hoffman ("Kramer v. Kramer" 1979; "Rain Man" 1988);

Tom Hanks ("Philadelphia" 1993; "Forrest Gump" 1994); and

Jack Nicholson ("One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest" 1975; "As Good As It Gets" 1997).

Eleven women — Luise Rainer, Bette Davis, Olivia de Havilland, Vivien Leigh, Ingrid Bergman, Elizabeth Taylor, Glenda Jackson, Jane Fonda, Sally Field, Jodie Foster, and Hilary Swank — each have two lead actress Oscars. And then there is Katharine Hepburn who reigns supreme with a staggering four lead actress Oscars.

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Lead actor winner Sean Penn ("Milk") has completed production on "The Tree of Life." This new film from Oscar-nominated writer/director Terrence Malick ("The Thin Red Line") tells the tale of a boy growing up in the Midwest of the 1950s. As a framework to that, Penn plays the grown-up version of the character coming to grips with his past. Rival lead actor nominee Brad Pitt ("The Curious Case of Benjamin Button") also stars in this drama that has no definite release date as of yet.

Today Variety is reporting that the politically minded Penn may play another real-life character — Ambassador Joseph Wilson, whose wife Valerie Plame (Naomi Watts) had her CIA cover blown by the Bush administration — in "Fair Game" from helmer Doug Liman ("Mr. and Mrs. Smith").

After back-to-back filming of grueling roles in both "The Reader" and "Revolutionary Road," lead actress winner Kate Winslet is taking a well-earned rest. However, there is no stopping supporting actress winner Penelope Cruz ("Vicky Christina Barcelona") who just wrapped production on the highly anticipated "Nine," which is due out at Thanksgiving.

This movie version of the 1982 Tony Award-winning musical (which was inspired by Federico Fellini's 1963 Oscar-winning "8 1/2") is loaded with Oscar winners: Daniel Day-Lewis as a wayward film director, Marion Cotillard as his faithful wife, Cruz as his mistress, Nicole Kidman as his protege, Judi Dench as his mentor and Sophia Loren as his mother. All are under the direction of Oscar nominee Rob Marshall ("Chicago").

And Cruz recently reunited with her good friend and mentor Pedro Almodovar to make "Los Abrazos Rotos" ("Loose Embraces"). Almodovar directed Cruz to a 2006 lead actress nomination for "Volver." For their fourth film together, they have made a modern-day film noir about a love square that will be released stateside in the fall.

RELATED POST:

Sean Penn is the ninth actor to win two lead Oscars

Oscar winners were predicted by guild awards

Live blogging the Oscars

Photo: Mark J. Terrill / Associated Press

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OSCAR PREDICTIONS

• Gold Derby's gutsy, 100% accurate Oscars predictions

• Gold Derby odds on the top Oscars races

• Experts predict who'll win the Oscars

• Sean Penn and Mickey Rourke in a real heavyweight bout

• Can Meryl Streep beat Kate Winslet at the Oscars?

• Rookie pundit needs a new Oscars crystal ball

OSCARS TELECAST

• Will Rob Pattinson sing with Mary Poppins at the Oscars?

• Will Miley Cyrus, Beyonce, Zac Efron and Rob Pattinson wow Oscars' viewers?

• 'Twilight' star Robert Pattinson will be an Oscars presenter

• Some Oscars TV ads still for sale — only $1.4 million a pop!

• Oscars are the Emmys' biggest winner

OSCARS HOST: HUGH JACKMAN

• Sneak Peek: See Hugh Jackman warming up his Oscar act

• Can Hugh Jackman continue the Oscars' love affair with Emmys?

OSCAR NOMINEES

• Heath Ledger's ultimate joke on the Oscars?

• Heath Ledger's family plans to take his Oscar, which should go to Matilda if he wins!

• Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie could be latest couple cursed at the Oscars

• Will Brad Pitt lose best actor due to Oscars' Slap the Stud Syndrome?

• Will the Babe Factor help Kate Winslet in a close Oscars contest with Meryl Streep?

• Watch out, Mickey Rourke: Indie Spirit is Oscar's consolation prize

• Penelope Cruz: 'Whatever happens, I will probably have a few beers and I don't drink!'

• No 'Doubt' Viola Davis could win at Oscars for portraying a long-suffering wife

OSCAR RACES

• 'Slumdog Millionaire' isn't doomed at the Oscars just because its actors got snubbed

• The Oscars' best picture usually = big picture

• Could 'Curious Case of Benjamin Button' suffer the worst shut-out in Oscars history?

• No, there is no bias against foreigners at the Oscars

• Here's why there will be an Oscars upset for best foreign film

OSCAR FLASHBACK

• Did 'Ben-Hur' deserve to win best picture at the Oscars?

OSCAR QUIZZES

• Quiz: Which actor had the most Oscar bids in a row?

• Quiz: Which Bette Davis flick suffered the worst Oscars' shut-out?

• Quiz: Who turned down Jodie Foster's Oscar-winning role in 'Lambs'?

• Quiz: Who won an Oscar on her birthday?

• Quiz: Which Oscar-winning role was not gay?

• Quiz: How much does an Oscar cost to make?

• Quiz: Which movies won for writing, directing and acting, but failed to win best picture?

Illustration by Ty Wilson

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After flirting with the Oscars for much of its 24-year history, this year's edition of the Independent Spirit Awards struck out on its own somewhat. For the first time in six years, none of the best picture contenders at the Spirits went on to reap an equivalent Oscar bid, though the ultimate winner — "The Wrestler" — was in the mix. By snubbing "Milk" as a best-picture nominee in favor of fare like "Ballast" and "Wendy and Lucy" that had no chance of making it into the final five at the Oscars, the Spirits regained a degree of their one-time independence.

However, while the acting nominees — as selected by screening committees — also had their fair share of unlikely Oscar hopefuls, the winners as chosen by the members of Film Independent are either Oscar contenders — Mickey Rourke ("The Wrestler"), Melissa Leo ( "Frozen River") and Penelope Cruz ("Vicky Christina Barcelona") — were also Oscar nominees or were from a film with eight Oscar nominations, albeit not one for him — James Franco ("Milk"). But don't make too much room on your mantle just yet, Mickey. The Spirits have taken on the status of consolation prize for Oscar acting contenders. As the saying goes, "Win on Saturday, lose on Sunday." That's not always true. Recent Spirit champs like Philip Seymour Hoffman ("Capote") and Charlize Theron ("Monster") repeated on a day later, but those victories tend to be the exception, not the rule.

"Milk" scripter Dustin Lance Black won the first screenplay prize at the Spirits while Woody Allen won the regular screenplay award for "Vicky Christina Barcelona." That Black is a contender at the Oscars for his original script for "Milk" is no surprise but that Allen was not Oscar nominated after 14 previous bids, including two wins, was quite the jaw-dropper. Oscar frontrunner "Man on Wire" won best documentary. And Oscar nominee "The Class" won foreign film, but I do not believe it will repeat tomorrow night at the Oscars. Read the Associated Press report on the winners here.

Oscar winning scripter Charlie Kaufman won the first feature prize for helming "Synecdoche, New York" while Thomas McCarthy took the directing award for "The Visitor." And Maryse Alberti won cinematography for "The Wrestler."

The Spirits are handed out in a very spirited daytime party held in a tent on the Santa Monica beach. As Variety once reported: "Many celebrities mused that they could think of no other Hollywood awards show where the guests had to wait in line for portable toilets while facing hordes of autograph-seeking fans." The wine flows almost as freely as the profanities. Just how will AMC edit Mickey Rourke's F-bomb laden acceptance speech for the rebroadcast tonight? The free-wheeling nature of the event has led to many other memorable moments over the years. One that sticks with me still is when director Kevin Smith won for the screenplay of "Chasing Amy" in 1997 and said in his acceptance speech: "This makes up for every chick who ever told me I had a small d**k."

The Spirits declared itself to be just that with the first best film back in 1985 — Martin Scorsese's "After Hours," described by Variety as "a nightmarish black comedy [in which] the cinema of paranoia and persecution reaches an apogee." But the award went mainstream the following year and opted for "Platoon," which went on to win best picture at the Oscars as well. From then on, most of the Spirits' picks for best pic would be players to one degree or another at the Oscars.

Check out The Envelope's Buzzmeter, where our shrewd Oscar seers are posting updated predix. Below is a random sampling with a few surprises. While Sean Penn ("Milk") leads among all of our pundits, Mickey Rourke ("The Wrestler") gets the backing of most of these leading Oscarologists for best actor.

Prognosticators featured in our chart below: Thelma Adams (Us Weekly), Pete Hammond (Notes on a Season, The Envelope), Mark Olsen (The Envelope), Sasha Stone (AwardsDaily.com), Kris Tapley (InContention.com), Jeffrey Wells (Hollywood-Elsewhere.com).

• Tomorrow (Feb. 13) is the deadline to enter material to compete for the One show Awards, which reward excellence in advertising and design. In addition to Gold, Silver and Bronze Pencil Awards, this year the first-ever Green Pencil Award will hail the best nonprofit/public service advertising that promotes the environment. With an all-star panel of notable industry professionals, The One Show will take place on May 6 in New York at Jazz at Lincoln Center. A separate ceremony for interactive work will be held on May 8 at Terminal 5 in New York. Deadline for that competition is Feb. 27. ONE SHOW.

• Mickey Rourke told a British tabloid that he's rooting for Sean Penn to beat him at the Oscars: "Sean Penn is a good friend of mine. When I was down and out, he got hold of me and told me exactly what to do and not to do. I owe him so much that I hope he wins the award." LONDON DAILY EXPRESS

• Many soap fans wonder: Why did "One Life to Live" diva Robin Strasser remove herself from consideration for a Daytime Emmy this year? "I don’t think the current Emmy system encourages team effort," she roars to Nelson Branco of TV Guide Canada. "I remember a moment in time when the dynamic of a cast got to change for at least two months and we nominated the best on our show. NATAS really lost me when they allowed judging to occur at home." THE SUDS REPORT

• Don't expect to see Meryl Streep in flashy designer garb at the Oscars. When she recently won best actress at the Screen Actors Guild Awards, she admitted to the audience, "I didn't even buy a dress!" as she showed off her plain black pants suit ensemble. Now she believes that Spartan fashion is her lucky charm. "I'll never buy a dress again!" she told World Entertainment News Network. WENN

• Luckily, these Oscars bloggers aren't having their smackdown on a high wire! David Carr of the New York Times takes on Kris Tapley of InContention.com for not liking "Man on Wire." CARPETBAGGER

• Getting ready for Stephen Frears' "Cheri," starring Michelle Pfeiffer, to enter the next Oscars derby, Nathaniel Rogers has been catching up on his Colette books, which he is, literally, swooning over. FILM EXPERIENCE

Photos: One Show, Robert Gauthier/ L.A. Times

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By winning best picture at the BAFTA Awards, "Slumdog Millionaire" just became the second film, after "American Beauty," to sweep the top prizes from all of these awards: Golden Globes, National Board of Review, Critics Choice and the four guilds — producers, directors, writers and actors (ensemble award at SAG).

Last year "No Country for Old Men" won all of those prizes except BAFTA and the Golden Globe — "Atonement" claimed both of those best-picture prizes. In 2005, "Brokeback Mountain" nearly pulled off such a sweep, but National Board of Review went for "Good Night, and Good Luck," and "Crash" won best ensemble acting at SAG.

This impressive derby trot by "Slumdog Millionaire" does not come close to matching the greatest sweep ever in the history of showbiz awards — "Schindler's List" (1993). Back then, the SAG ensemble award and Critics Choice Awards didn't exist, but it swept up all best-picture prizes from every other major Hollywood awards group. It even pulled off a rare sweep of the critics trifecta: New York Film Critics Circle, Los Angeles Film Critics Assn. and National Society of Film Critics. All three disagreed this year. The Angelenos picked "Wall-E," New Yorkers got "Milk" and the national society danced off with "Waltz With Bashir." Curiously, all three critics' awards went their own way in 1999 when "American Beauty" paved the way for "Slumdog Millionaire's" romp at other top awards this year.

Ever since BAFTA moved up its awards calendar in 2000 so that its ceremony would precede the Oscar show — and therefore, presumably, influence it — the two awards agreed only twice on best picture: "Gladiator" (2000) and "Lord of the Rings: Return of the King" (2003).

However, they've overlapped much more frequently in the acting races: 18 of the past 32 performance awards. Most impressive is that they agreed completely over the past two years. What about now?

Three of the four stars hailed as the Oscar front-runners by most award gurus came through at BAFTA: Kate Winslet ("The Reader"), Heath Ledger ("The Dark Knight") and Penélope Cruz ("Vicky Cristina Barcelona").

However, Sean Penn ("Milk") lost to Mickey Rourke ("The Wrestler"). Both have won top awards during the derby so far: Penn bagged SAG, Rourke claimed the Golden Globe. Both have momentum and mega-buzz. By boosting "The Wrestler" star, this BAFTA victory turns the Oscar best-actor slugfest into a real heavyweight bout.

Beware: Over the past eight years, BAFTA has correctly predicted Oscar's best-actor champs only four times — but they were the past four champs. Four out of five nominees agree in both categories this year. Dev Patel ("Slumdog Millionaire") bumped Oscar nominee Richard Jenkins ("The Visitor") at BAFTA.